An interesting question, posed by an uncredited writer for Evangelical Tract Distributors. We are treated to a story very much like that of The Fortune Teller, involving a group of people on a train. We are also treated to an unmistakable air of self-righteous smugness.
Our nameless narrator, who identifies himself as "an old man," tells a story of a group of men traveling to a Christian Conference on a train. "As the train steamed out of the station," two women carrying "a novel of the sensational type" entered their car "and took seats opposite each other." The old man and his friends "conversed on the Christian Conference" and "got enthusiastically engaged in the subject of God's Grace, God's truth, and God's Son."
"Presently," the two women found that "the conversation above referred to seemed to break in upon the enjoyment of the readers." It turns out that their novels "of the sensational type" proved "incapable of absorbing the mind as completely as desirable." "Presently" (again) one of the women spoke up about how "abominable" it was to "be bored to death with this religious nonsense." This leads to a heated debate that eventually arrives at the titular question, and the old man manages to ask that six-word question using only 31 words. He just loves going on and on about every little detail.
Heh. Like I should talk!
After he's finished asking "the haughty girl" if she would enjoy en eternity of "blessings and joys" of Jesus "if a few minute's conversation about" them "is so abhorent to" her, the woman apparently turned "ashly pale" and "her tongue seemed chained." She left "without saying a word" with her friend at the next station, offering only "a sad, sad look at the gentleman" before she "was seen no more." This was because his words, which "were calmly and kindly spoken" to her, "seemed to have wondrous power." If he does say so himself. A lot like a similar set of words from Suppose It Is All True After All? What Then?. But where that tract attempted to scare readers with the notion that Hell and Judgment might be real, Would You Be Happy dares to posit that Heaven might not be for everyone. Indeed, "before Heaven could be a Heaven to you, a great change must take place in your desires, your tastes," etc. In other words, you need to get Saved before Heaven will be appealing to you! What a unique predicament.
This raises an interesting point - if a person finds the Word of God "distasteful" and "abhorent," how are Christians supposed to reach them? Or are such people acceptable losses? Perhaps not; this tract is a step in the right direction. Before it can be truly effective, however, it needs a rewrite into plain English from this century. One of the women actually says: "I declare..." Really??
Points for daring, but not much more, E.T.D.
Likely to Convert - 0
Artwork - 2
Ability to Hold Interest - 2
Unintentional Hilarity - 5
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 0
And before anyone nails me for it, the misspelling of "abhorent" and "ashly" are direct quotes from the tract, not me being a bad speller.
Monday, March 16, 2015
Saturday, May 24, 2014
It's All About You!
Here's some Chick for a modern audience. While the last Chick Tract I reviewed, The Sissy, made reference to The Bionic Man, this tract is set very much in today's world. Or, at least, within the last ten years.
It's All About You is aimed at young people, or rather the impression Jack has of them. We meet Hannah, a self-absorbed whiner of a college student who isn't named until page 11. "Life is so unfair!" she tells her grandpa, who hangs around her college for some reason. "Nobody understands the 'inner me'." And "I didn't ask to be born, you know!" Based on these statements, Gramps deduces that she's "got it all figured out." Nevertheless, he warns her about two "someones" who have "seen things you'd rather people didn't know about," especially since "one of them has it in for you!" As you can imagine, this causes Hannah some alarm.
"He wants to steal the most valuable thing you've got," Gramps tells her.
"My iPod?" Hannah cries, demonstrating Jack Chick's deft hand at comedy while simultaneously dating this tract to the mid-2000s. If written today, it probably would have been an iPhone 5. Or a Tablet. Or a copy of The Five Demons You Meet In Hell.
Of course, Gramps is really talking about Hannah's soul. He tells her that "forces in the spirit world - angels and devils" are in "a war to see who gets" it. He lays the FEAR on nice and thick; "Satan means business" and will "do anything to destroy your soul," and "absolutely nothing is hidden from the eyes of God" because "everything you do, say or think is being recorded." Apparently God is in charge of the United States' Homeland Security! Our "sins just keep piling up" and "that blocks us from going to heaven."
Think Gramps is finished? Hell, no! He's just warming up. Among Satan's chief weapons are "STDs, drugs or booze," and "his rotten crowd" might even "make you binge and purge your meals." Huh? Where did that come from? Every now and then Jack Chick will throw in something totally random.
What are not so random are the pot-shots Jack takes at other religions. There's a picture of four "phoney 'holy men'" including an excellent caricature of the Dalai Lama and an okay rendering of former pope and pedophile-enabler/protector Ratzinger. "Religion pretends to be holy" while putting "their own followers into bondage." We see an image of a corrupt Catholic priest trying to con a grieving widow, and no bout of Chick religion-bashing would be complete without an image of a Muslim suicide bomber.
Now that Hannah has been sufficiently terrorized, Gramps tells her "the Good News" about Jesus "making the only way for us to get to heaven" by dying and shedding "His holy blood to wash away our sins." "But isn't that religion?" Hannah asks, reasonably enough, but Gramps assures her it is not. Hannah gets Saved, and says that "Jesus loves me and really understands me." And he won't steal her iPod, either!
In my review of The Sissy?, I mentioned that the character Duke was likely a stand-in for a certain type of person, namely big hairy tough guys who drive trucks. In It's All About You, Hannah would seem to be representing the youth of today - sullen, ungrateful, self-absorbed, and in dire need of Saving. As always, Jack Chick's tracts reveal more about himself than they do about God.
The art is up to Jack's usual standard. The only place where I felt his drawings were lacking were the depictions of Hannah's fingers in three 'close-up shots' (including the cover). They look more like the digits of an old crone, not a young lady. Also, from page 17 onward, Jack draws her face with more realistically-defined lips. Not sure what that's all about.
A regular feature in numerous Chick Tracts is the addition of cute, funny animals, almost always the same dog and cat. Jack will draw them into numerous panels, perhaps as a bit of levity or maybe just to fill in some empty space. They appear in 13 panels in It's All About You, while recurring deity Ol' Faceless only cameos in two.
The entire approach of It's All About You seems off-message to me, starting with that title. Jack presents Hannah as obnoxiously self-absorbed, but he does not criticize her for it. Rather, he indulges it. Hannah doesn't have to give up her self-centredness to become Saved (yes, she does say "sorry I sin and am so selfish," but talk is cheap). Like Duke in The Sissy, she is not encouraged to be a better person.
In the end, it's not all about you at all - it's about getting Saved, just like any other tract. And while this tract has only a moderate amount of offensive content (5 panels, including the previously mentioned suicide bomber and a dig at lesbians on Page 3), it should prove to be very insulting to its target audience.
And yet, isn't this true of all tracts? They all tell you that you're a sinner, and that you deserve to burn forever. They have to make you believe this, so they can sell you the Good News of Salvation. The insult, or at least the unfavourable judgment, is essential to the delivery of the Message.
But that's neither here nor there. It's All About You is a standard, unremarkable Chick tract that attempts to make ancient scripture relevant to today. It might have had a chance if another young character had preached to Hannah instead of her grandpa. Instead, we get an old guy trying to tell a young person how to live her life. Get off of Satan's lawn, whippersnapper, and onto Jesus' sidewalk! If it's one thing we know about the youth of today, it's their willingness to respect their elders and hang on their every word.
Good luck with that, Jack. You'll have an easier time stealing their iPods.
It's All About You!
Likely to Convert - 3
Artwork - 8
Ability to Hold Interest - 7
Unintentional Hilarity - 3
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 4
It's All About You is aimed at young people, or rather the impression Jack has of them. We meet Hannah, a self-absorbed whiner of a college student who isn't named until page 11. "Life is so unfair!" she tells her grandpa, who hangs around her college for some reason. "Nobody understands the 'inner me'." And "I didn't ask to be born, you know!" Based on these statements, Gramps deduces that she's "got it all figured out." Nevertheless, he warns her about two "someones" who have "seen things you'd rather people didn't know about," especially since "one of them has it in for you!" As you can imagine, this causes Hannah some alarm.
"He wants to steal the most valuable thing you've got," Gramps tells her.
"My iPod?" Hannah cries, demonstrating Jack Chick's deft hand at comedy while simultaneously dating this tract to the mid-2000s. If written today, it probably would have been an iPhone 5. Or a Tablet. Or a copy of The Five Demons You Meet In Hell.
Of course, Gramps is really talking about Hannah's soul. He tells her that "forces in the spirit world - angels and devils" are in "a war to see who gets" it. He lays the FEAR on nice and thick; "Satan means business" and will "do anything to destroy your soul," and "absolutely nothing is hidden from the eyes of God" because "everything you do, say or think is being recorded." Apparently God is in charge of the United States' Homeland Security! Our "sins just keep piling up" and "that blocks us from going to heaven."
Think Gramps is finished? Hell, no! He's just warming up. Among Satan's chief weapons are "STDs, drugs or booze," and "his rotten crowd" might even "make you binge and purge your meals." Huh? Where did that come from? Every now and then Jack Chick will throw in something totally random.
What are not so random are the pot-shots Jack takes at other religions. There's a picture of four "phoney 'holy men'" including an excellent caricature of the Dalai Lama and an okay rendering of former pope and pedophile-enabler/protector Ratzinger. "Religion pretends to be holy" while putting "their own followers into bondage." We see an image of a corrupt Catholic priest trying to con a grieving widow, and no bout of Chick religion-bashing would be complete without an image of a Muslim suicide bomber.
Now that Hannah has been sufficiently terrorized, Gramps tells her "the Good News" about Jesus "making the only way for us to get to heaven" by dying and shedding "His holy blood to wash away our sins." "But isn't that religion?" Hannah asks, reasonably enough, but Gramps assures her it is not. Hannah gets Saved, and says that "Jesus loves me and really understands me." And he won't steal her iPod, either!
In my review of The Sissy?, I mentioned that the character Duke was likely a stand-in for a certain type of person, namely big hairy tough guys who drive trucks. In It's All About You, Hannah would seem to be representing the youth of today - sullen, ungrateful, self-absorbed, and in dire need of Saving. As always, Jack Chick's tracts reveal more about himself than they do about God.
The art is up to Jack's usual standard. The only place where I felt his drawings were lacking were the depictions of Hannah's fingers in three 'close-up shots' (including the cover). They look more like the digits of an old crone, not a young lady. Also, from page 17 onward, Jack draws her face with more realistically-defined lips. Not sure what that's all about.
A regular feature in numerous Chick Tracts is the addition of cute, funny animals, almost always the same dog and cat. Jack will draw them into numerous panels, perhaps as a bit of levity or maybe just to fill in some empty space. They appear in 13 panels in It's All About You, while recurring deity Ol' Faceless only cameos in two.
The entire approach of It's All About You seems off-message to me, starting with that title. Jack presents Hannah as obnoxiously self-absorbed, but he does not criticize her for it. Rather, he indulges it. Hannah doesn't have to give up her self-centredness to become Saved (yes, she does say "sorry I sin and am so selfish," but talk is cheap). Like Duke in The Sissy, she is not encouraged to be a better person.
In the end, it's not all about you at all - it's about getting Saved, just like any other tract. And while this tract has only a moderate amount of offensive content (5 panels, including the previously mentioned suicide bomber and a dig at lesbians on Page 3), it should prove to be very insulting to its target audience.
And yet, isn't this true of all tracts? They all tell you that you're a sinner, and that you deserve to burn forever. They have to make you believe this, so they can sell you the Good News of Salvation. The insult, or at least the unfavourable judgment, is essential to the delivery of the Message.
But that's neither here nor there. It's All About You is a standard, unremarkable Chick tract that attempts to make ancient scripture relevant to today. It might have had a chance if another young character had preached to Hannah instead of her grandpa. Instead, we get an old guy trying to tell a young person how to live her life. Get off of Satan's lawn, whippersnapper, and onto Jesus' sidewalk! If it's one thing we know about the youth of today, it's their willingness to respect their elders and hang on their every word.
Good luck with that, Jack. You'll have an easier time stealing their iPods.
It's All About You!
Likely to Convert - 3
Artwork - 8
Ability to Hold Interest - 7
Unintentional Hilarity - 3
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 4
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
The Sissy?
Here's Jack Chick at his absolute finest! If you are ever asked for an example of Chick's work (not very likely, but go with it),show them this one.
This is the story of Duke, a trucker who's tough as nails... nails that've been pounded through steel! After stopping bullets. Yeah. He rides with his best buddy Billy Joe. You don't learn Billy Joe's name until the very last panel because he's not in any way important. They pull in to a truck stop and see the words "Jesus Saves" on the back of an 18-wheeler. "Only a gutless idiot would have that up there!" says Duke, "...cuz Jesus was a sissy!" No sooner are the words out of his mouth when the driver of that rig turns up. He's a full head taller than Duke (he calls him 'little fella') and built like a tank. If Duke's as tough as bulletproof nails pounded through steel, this guy is the hammer! "How's about you boys joining me for supper?" the hammer asks, his plate-sized hands on their shoulders offering them very little choice in the matter.
Once in the truck stop with food ordered, the Jesus giant (who never gets a name) asks Duke why he thinks "Jesus was a sissy?" This leads to a ridiculous argument over who would win in a fight - a man with God's power, or "some dude." "That wouldn't be a fair fight," Duke points out. "It'd be like fighting the Bionic Man... only worse!" Who remembers The Six Million Dollar Man? Heck, even the remake of The Bionic Woman is old these days!
Jesus Giant gives the full Jesus story, complete with the warning that Duke is going to Hell. As he talks, their waitress (Martha) listens in. She isn't very important to the story either (but more important than Billy Joe), but she gets a name, too! Poor giant dude! Anyway, Duke isn't happy with the giant's assessment of his afterlife allotment. "You mean I should stop boozing, swearing and cheating on my old woman, and start going to church and lead the good life?" he asks. "Nope!" Giant replies, and he goes on to tell Duke that stuff "wouldn't do you any good" because he'd "still be goin' to hell!"
I pause the review here to look at that last interaction. Giant's response is strange, in that it completely divorces the notion of Salvation from doing (or being) good. He might have said, "that ain't enough to Save you, Duke," but he doesn't. Not what Chick intended, perhaps. Or is it? Tracts keep reminding us how our good works won't get us into Heaven, because the Bible says they are as filthy rags or somesuch. Chick seems to take that to its logical conclusion: one's actions and one's character don't matter to God, only whether or not one is Saved.
I'll leave the implications of that notion for another post.
Giant Jesus Truck Dude keeps the pressure on, making sure two important things remain in the forefront of Duke's mind: "He'll send (all sinners including Duke) to the Lake of Fire, and you called him a sissy!" Duke, Billy Joe and even Martha believe everything the Giant says, and all three get Saved. The tract ends with Duke back in his rig, saying "that Jesus had more guts than any man that ever lived." His truck even sports a brand new "Jesus Saves" bumper sticker.
The artwork in The Sissy? is some of Jack's best. The characters are perfectly realized, none more so than Duke. He's the meanest-looking bruiser you could imagine, and Jack's attention to detail is extraordinary when you consider he drew each hair on Duke's arms, knuckles, chest and back by hand. Plus, his visual transition from mean tough guy to worried sinner is flawless and credible. The others are also painstakingly detailed, but they don't stand out the way Duke does. Even the obligatory image of Christ on the cross is tame by comparison!
Duke is, of course, an avatar for the people Chick hopes this tract will reach. It's also a clear image of how he sees them; swarthy, sweaty gorillas who would just as soon punch his lights out as look at him. This could be you, Jack seems to be saying. You're tough, you probably think those Jesus people're a bunch of wimps, but if I was as big and strong as my giant dude here... Ah, nothing like a good ol' revenge fantasy!
The Sissy? is, like I said, some of Jack Chick's finest work. Entertaining, expertly drawn, and not completely implausible, this tract might just make a few people into Believers. The arguments the Jesus Giant puts forth are, on the surface, clever. They don’t actually prove anything, of course; all they do is set Duke up for the next stage in his conversion. Sure do make Jesus Giant look smart, though.
Was Jesus a sissy? Who cares? As long as there are still people out there debating this crucial theological issue, there will be a need for tracts like this one. Keep ‘em coming, Jack!
The Sissy?
Likely to Convert - 4
Artwork - 10
Ability to Hold Interest - 7
Unintentional Hilarity - 4
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 1
This is the story of Duke, a trucker who's tough as nails... nails that've been pounded through steel! After stopping bullets. Yeah. He rides with his best buddy Billy Joe. You don't learn Billy Joe's name until the very last panel because he's not in any way important. They pull in to a truck stop and see the words "Jesus Saves" on the back of an 18-wheeler. "Only a gutless idiot would have that up there!" says Duke, "...cuz Jesus was a sissy!" No sooner are the words out of his mouth when the driver of that rig turns up. He's a full head taller than Duke (he calls him 'little fella') and built like a tank. If Duke's as tough as bulletproof nails pounded through steel, this guy is the hammer! "How's about you boys joining me for supper?" the hammer asks, his plate-sized hands on their shoulders offering them very little choice in the matter.
Once in the truck stop with food ordered, the Jesus giant (who never gets a name) asks Duke why he thinks "Jesus was a sissy?" This leads to a ridiculous argument over who would win in a fight - a man with God's power, or "some dude." "That wouldn't be a fair fight," Duke points out. "It'd be like fighting the Bionic Man... only worse!" Who remembers The Six Million Dollar Man? Heck, even the remake of The Bionic Woman is old these days!
Jesus Giant gives the full Jesus story, complete with the warning that Duke is going to Hell. As he talks, their waitress (Martha) listens in. She isn't very important to the story either (but more important than Billy Joe), but she gets a name, too! Poor giant dude! Anyway, Duke isn't happy with the giant's assessment of his afterlife allotment. "You mean I should stop boozing, swearing and cheating on my old woman, and start going to church and lead the good life?" he asks. "Nope!" Giant replies, and he goes on to tell Duke that stuff "wouldn't do you any good" because he'd "still be goin' to hell!"
I pause the review here to look at that last interaction. Giant's response is strange, in that it completely divorces the notion of Salvation from doing (or being) good. He might have said, "that ain't enough to Save you, Duke," but he doesn't. Not what Chick intended, perhaps. Or is it? Tracts keep reminding us how our good works won't get us into Heaven, because the Bible says they are as filthy rags or somesuch. Chick seems to take that to its logical conclusion: one's actions and one's character don't matter to God, only whether or not one is Saved.
I'll leave the implications of that notion for another post.
Giant Jesus Truck Dude keeps the pressure on, making sure two important things remain in the forefront of Duke's mind: "He'll send (all sinners including Duke) to the Lake of Fire, and you called him a sissy!" Duke, Billy Joe and even Martha believe everything the Giant says, and all three get Saved. The tract ends with Duke back in his rig, saying "that Jesus had more guts than any man that ever lived." His truck even sports a brand new "Jesus Saves" bumper sticker.
The artwork in The Sissy? is some of Jack's best. The characters are perfectly realized, none more so than Duke. He's the meanest-looking bruiser you could imagine, and Jack's attention to detail is extraordinary when you consider he drew each hair on Duke's arms, knuckles, chest and back by hand. Plus, his visual transition from mean tough guy to worried sinner is flawless and credible. The others are also painstakingly detailed, but they don't stand out the way Duke does. Even the obligatory image of Christ on the cross is tame by comparison!
Duke is, of course, an avatar for the people Chick hopes this tract will reach. It's also a clear image of how he sees them; swarthy, sweaty gorillas who would just as soon punch his lights out as look at him. This could be you, Jack seems to be saying. You're tough, you probably think those Jesus people're a bunch of wimps, but if I was as big and strong as my giant dude here... Ah, nothing like a good ol' revenge fantasy!
The Sissy? is, like I said, some of Jack Chick's finest work. Entertaining, expertly drawn, and not completely implausible, this tract might just make a few people into Believers. The arguments the Jesus Giant puts forth are, on the surface, clever. They don’t actually prove anything, of course; all they do is set Duke up for the next stage in his conversion. Sure do make Jesus Giant look smart, though.
Was Jesus a sissy? Who cares? As long as there are still people out there debating this crucial theological issue, there will be a need for tracts like this one. Keep ‘em coming, Jack!
The Sissy?
Likely to Convert - 4
Artwork - 10
Ability to Hold Interest - 7
Unintentional Hilarity - 4
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 1
Friday, March 14, 2014
7 Last Words
So, seven last sentences, then. For a man suffering a truly horrible death, the Lord was quite chatty. Each sentence has extra meaning for us all, even if the tract author has to stretch things a bit to make the meaning work. "Woman, behold thy son..., behold thy mother." apparently means that Jesus "has His eye on the sparrow" which means he knows about "your smallest needs." Because it shows he cared about his mother. I think. Maybe she liked birds.
"I thirst." John 19:28 proves that he "was human as well as divine" and therefore "the suffering of His body" due to "the intense agony of thirst" was real.
"It is finished." John 19:30 means that it is finished. How about that?
I'd quote the other ones, but they are too long and I really don't care. Look them up yourself. I only care about whether or not this tract is convincing. After reading all seven statements that Jesus allegedly said while hanging on the cross, do I feel compelled to become a Christian? Or "is it nothing to you, all ye that pass by?"
In a word, no. The tract does not provide me with enough information. Or (say it with me) proof.
"Millions have since heard these Words," the tract says, "but have passed by in unbelief." Yep, just like I'm doing now. And I imagine I'm in very good company. Or sinful company. Whichever words you are comfortable with.
"Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." Apt words to describe the authors of this tract, I would say!
7 Last Words
Likely to Convert - 1
Artwork - 1
Ability to Hold Interest - 2
Unintentional Hilarity - 2
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 1
Thursday, November 14, 2013
The Only Doorway
Boring. But there is a bit in this one I hadn't heard or read before. Apparently, if you try "to enter Heaven some other way than through the way Jesus provided," then "you are a thief and a robber." That's right, a thief AND a robber. There's a difference, apparently. What that difference is, the tract does not elaborate on. Nor does it reveal exactly what it is you are supposed to be stealing. You could be swiping a way into Heaven, I suppose. Which implies there are other ways into Heaven, doesn't it? The tract quotes John 10:1, wherein Jesus says that if you "entereth not by the door into the sheepfold, but climbeth up some other way," then you're a robber/thief. Scriptural proof from the holy horse's mouth that there are other ways into Heaven!
So the title of this tract is wrong. Nevertheless, the author spends the remaining 2 1/2 pages trying to prove it right. "There is no other way to get to Heaven," the author states, listing religion, the preacher, water baptism, church membership, being a moral person and doing good works among the many things that are "not the way." Well, of course they aren't. None of those things involve climbething.
"Don't let the devil deceive you by making you believe there is some other way," the author implores. But Jesus said we could climbeth! Does that mean He's... the Devil?!? Spooky.
Getting back to the title metaphor, we are told "you enter the door by asking Jesus to come into your heart and save you." Standard issue tract message. Nothing new here. Same goes for the Sinner's Prayer on the back. All the good stuff is on the first page, and can be used to annoy any fundamentalist who tries the "one way to Heaven" approach on you.
"Jesus is the door..." the tract states and restates, and quotes John 10:9 to make sure things are clear: "I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture." Ahem. Sounds kinda dirty. Especially since a pasture is a place where you sow your seeds. But who am I to judge? If you can get Saved by entering Jesus, then going in and out until you sow those seeds into that pasture, go for it!
Just close the door behind you.
The Only Doorway
Likely to Convert - 1
Artwork - 3
Ability to Hold Interest - 3
Unintentional Hilarity - 6
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 1
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Deliverance For You
So, a tract from this guy ought to be pretty powerful and convincing, right? Yes it should. Too bad this one isn't.
"We all know how the world has radically changed since the turn of the century," the tract begins. And no, he isn't talking about the year 2000 onwards - he means the last century. "Twenty years ago we used to go down to the seaport to watch the ships come in," Billy says, "but now it is to the airport to watch the planes come down." "Once it was the telegraph but now it is the television."
Not only is this tract seriously out of date, but Billy makes it seem like he really needs a life.
This reminiscing about the not-so-recent past does actually go somewhere. "But with all our progress," Billy writes, "man has not solved the basic problems of the human race." He narrows those basic problems down to three: Sin, Sorrow and Death. Sounds like the name of a goth band. "These three problems make up man's history," and "it all seems rather hopeless" when a person "begins to think about it." Yes, Heaven forbid we start thinking.
Fortunately, Billy has "a rainbow of hope" to "put in your heart." I don't need to tell you what that rainbow is, but I will anyway: "Jesus Christ can meet and solve these three basic problems of your life." Apparently "it has been proved millions of times over." Like most tract authors, Billy neglects to provide the tiniest hint of that proof. I shouldn't be surprised about that, and I'm not. I am disappointed, though. Should not the famous Billy Graham be held to a higher standard?
Jesus "can meet your every need, lift every burden, solve every problem." That's quite a claim, and kind of a hard sell. Perhaps Jesus "can give you hope" and "deliver you from the fear of the future," "the perils of the present trouble" and "the penalty of past sin." I can make the same claims about my glorious man-parts, but that doesn't make them true. And an atheist isn't likely to believe even a pastor of Billy Graham's stature without some kind of evidence to back such claims up.
Incidentally, the cover image of a guy at his desk, face-palming while looking at on-screen tax forms, has nothing whatsoever to do with the material inside the tract.
Does Billy Graham expect us to believe him simply because he's a famous guy? I hope not. If Tom Cruise can't sell me on Scientology, Bill, then you haven't got a prayer.
Deliverance For You
Likely to Convert - 2
Artwork - 4
Ability to Hold Interest - 3
Unintentional Hilarity - 4
Rainbows of Hope - 1
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - 0
Monday, September 30, 2013
Let's Fly Away!
This is a contemporary Chick Tract, delivering the message that the world is horrible and getting worse, but Jesus makes everything better. Half of it seems to be aimed at kids, but the other half deals with very grown up issues. Ultimately, God and Jesus are presented as an escape from the troubles of the current day and age.
The story (as much as there is one) starts with the closing of a broke company. "The new regulations killed our jobs!" the former boss tells former employee Greg. "It's happening all over." Greg returns home to his alcoholic wife Delores, who freaks at the news of his termination. "Factories everywhere are closing!" Greg tells her. "The whole country is in a mess." He tries to console her with the story of their next door neighbour Herb, who lost his job, his house, his wife and his kids, but who "says everything is..." And before we can learn what that is is, a gunshot sounds from the house next door. "Herb blew his brains out!" says a dude who seems way too happy about it. The other neighbours are just as creepy - one wants to see what's left of Herb's face, and others set out to loot his home. Wow, humanity sure does suck.
Having established the state of the world as he sees it, Jack Chick introduces Greg and Delores' daughter Julie. She's got great big staring-at-oncoming-headlights eyes, and an innocence bordering on stupidity. She makes friends with Karen, the daughter of the happy smiley couple who just moved in across the street. Karen wastes no time preaching to Julie, telling her that "in God's eyes you are a lying thief!" Liars and thieves "go to the other place!" Karen adds, and we assume she isn't talking about Disneyland. Having sufficiently terrorized Julie, Karen moves in for the Save. "Jesus is coming to get us," she tells her new convert. "He'll meet us in the clouds." The two happy girls jump up and down on Karen's bed, singing "We'll fly away!" Hence this tract's title.
With that, the kid-friendly portion of the tract ends. Julie tells her parents about Jesus, but finds them less than receptive. "We hate that name!" Greg tells her. "You need a nut doctor!" adds Dolores. It seems that while Julie was getting Saved, her parents were busy turning evil. Greg now sports tattoos of skulls, snakes, and Satan's face, and Dolores has become a drug dealer. The way non-Believers do.
The tract ends with Julie jumping on her own bed and singing at two in the morning. Greg has every right to be pissed at the "rotten brat," but his decision to "give her a beating she'll never forget" seems a little extreme. But when Greg barges into Julie's room to open his can of whup-ass, Julie is gone... leaving only her slippers behind! Lucky for her the Rapture happened just in time to save her, right? Although technically, if she had been Raptured, she'd have left behind her pajamas as well. Maybe she just hid under the bed.
Let's Fly Away! paints a very bleak picture of our world, where everyone is a right bastard and life completely sucks. In fact, the whole world is that angry father, coming to our room to beat us. If only we could escape...
And that's Jesus - a magical escape from all your troubles. And eternal damnation. Can't forget that.
"Those religious jerks have made you go crazy!" Dolores tells her converted daughter. "Never mention Jesus again!" says her dad. Is this really what Jack Chick thinks unBelievers are like? Apparently. The only people in the tract who aren't portrayed as pond scum are Karen, her mom, and Julie. If you're not Saved, you must be evil. If that's how Jack sees humanity, how can we take him seriously?
"The whole country is in a mess," Greg says, and maybe he's right. It will take a lot to fix it, and waiting for a miracle escape isn't going to help anybody.
Let's Fly Away!
Likely to Convert - 2
Artwork - 7
Ability to Hold Interest - 4
Unintentional Hilarity - 4
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - ?
The story (as much as there is one) starts with the closing of a broke company. "The new regulations killed our jobs!" the former boss tells former employee Greg. "It's happening all over." Greg returns home to his alcoholic wife Delores, who freaks at the news of his termination. "Factories everywhere are closing!" Greg tells her. "The whole country is in a mess." He tries to console her with the story of their next door neighbour Herb, who lost his job, his house, his wife and his kids, but who "says everything is..." And before we can learn what that is is, a gunshot sounds from the house next door. "Herb blew his brains out!" says a dude who seems way too happy about it. The other neighbours are just as creepy - one wants to see what's left of Herb's face, and others set out to loot his home. Wow, humanity sure does suck.
Having established the state of the world as he sees it, Jack Chick introduces Greg and Delores' daughter Julie. She's got great big staring-at-oncoming-headlights eyes, and an innocence bordering on stupidity. She makes friends with Karen, the daughter of the happy smiley couple who just moved in across the street. Karen wastes no time preaching to Julie, telling her that "in God's eyes you are a lying thief!" Liars and thieves "go to the other place!" Karen adds, and we assume she isn't talking about Disneyland. Having sufficiently terrorized Julie, Karen moves in for the Save. "Jesus is coming to get us," she tells her new convert. "He'll meet us in the clouds." The two happy girls jump up and down on Karen's bed, singing "We'll fly away!" Hence this tract's title.
With that, the kid-friendly portion of the tract ends. Julie tells her parents about Jesus, but finds them less than receptive. "We hate that name!" Greg tells her. "You need a nut doctor!" adds Dolores. It seems that while Julie was getting Saved, her parents were busy turning evil. Greg now sports tattoos of skulls, snakes, and Satan's face, and Dolores has become a drug dealer. The way non-Believers do.
The tract ends with Julie jumping on her own bed and singing at two in the morning. Greg has every right to be pissed at the "rotten brat," but his decision to "give her a beating she'll never forget" seems a little extreme. But when Greg barges into Julie's room to open his can of whup-ass, Julie is gone... leaving only her slippers behind! Lucky for her the Rapture happened just in time to save her, right? Although technically, if she had been Raptured, she'd have left behind her pajamas as well. Maybe she just hid under the bed.
Let's Fly Away! paints a very bleak picture of our world, where everyone is a right bastard and life completely sucks. In fact, the whole world is that angry father, coming to our room to beat us. If only we could escape...
And that's Jesus - a magical escape from all your troubles. And eternal damnation. Can't forget that.
"Those religious jerks have made you go crazy!" Dolores tells her converted daughter. "Never mention Jesus again!" says her dad. Is this really what Jack Chick thinks unBelievers are like? Apparently. The only people in the tract who aren't portrayed as pond scum are Karen, her mom, and Julie. If you're not Saved, you must be evil. If that's how Jack sees humanity, how can we take him seriously?
"The whole country is in a mess," Greg says, and maybe he's right. It will take a lot to fix it, and waiting for a miracle escape isn't going to help anybody.
Let's Fly Away!
Likely to Convert - 2
Artwork - 7
Ability to Hold Interest - 4
Unintentional Hilarity - 4
Level of Disturbing or Offensive Content - ?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
